Friday, June 30, 2006

Not much new!

Well, no exciting new from this household yet...the wait continues. We are still remaining patient and are enjoying each step we take in preparing for the arrival of our baby! We got our baby furniture and stroller/carrier and all of the necessary items we need. We are definitely prepared in case we're called at any moment. We still need to do some organizing of the baby's room, as we still have some of our stuff in there to get cleaned out. I think we're planning on doing that on Sunday.

This weekend will be fun filled though, we plan on heading up to Colo on Saturday morning and spending the day and night with Sean's family. His brother and sister and their spouses and our niece and nephew will be there! We are so excited to see them!!!! Then we will watch the fireworks from Sean's parents' house and just hang out. Sunday we'll go to church in with his family and then head back down here where we will be then heading to Chris and Brenda's and I will be cutting their hair. And this family haircutting day will include Bode!!!!! He will get his first haircut, so I am sure you will see some pictures of the momentous occasion! Then we plan on heading home to get some stuff cleaned out of the baby's room. That's our plan at least...sometimes things don't always go as planned! :) Well, I plan on having a new post up this weekend filled with pictures of our niece and nephew, Leah and Tyler! Hope you all have a Happy 4th!

Monday, June 26, 2006

Putting together the crib

 
 
 
 
We got our baby furniture today and assembled the crib. Actually Sean did the assembly and I took pictures! :) He was pretty excited when it was done. Then, I decided to put some of my bedding in the crib so that I could see what it was going to look like. I LOVE it. We don't have a sheet yet, so I just put the blanket in over the matress so you can't see the matress. The last picture is of the crib with one of the 3 pictures that will be hanging on the wall. I think it is going to be adorable!!!!! The room isn't completely cleared out yet, so when it is, I will take pictures of the whole room and post them. Hopefully within the next week it will be completed. We are sooooo excited! Also, just thought I would let you all know that our profile hasn't been posted on the website yet, but I will let you all know the minute it's up!

I had a WONDERFUL shower this weekend and it really made things real! It was so perfect and everyone had a great time. Thanks to all who were involved! Posted by Picasa

A Family Picture!

 
 
 
 

It takes a lot to get a good family photo of the Stewart clan! Seriously, it was no easy task, but as you can see, we FINALLY succeeded! Posted by Picasa
 
The final product of trying to get the whole family to behave all at the same time! Posted by Picasa

The Weekend

 
 
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Well, we had a wonderful weekend and the kids had tons of fun too! They all had fun climbing the tree at Chris and Brenda's. Here are a few pictures of the kids.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Dogsitting

 
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Sean and I dogsat for Cassie and Paul last night. It was so fun! Harley was stinky when she came to us though, so we gave her a bath and she did really well. She didn't love it, but she was a big girl! :) I sure had fun! As you can see in the picture, I had to give her a little curl on the top of her head like mom used to do to us when we were babies. It was so funny to see her all wet and skinny! She is usually just a puffball and you don't realize how skinny she is because of all of her hair. It was cute! In the process of giving her a bath, we pulled a tic out of her and a burr out of her. Poor thing! Also, she got a haircut! C'mon, you didn't really think she'd get out of my house without a haircut did you?! Cassie asked me to trim the hair around her eyes...easier said than done, I must say. I got it done though. Harley didn't like that part very much, nor did she enjoy the blow drying part. Well, we all made it out alive and Harley smelled good enough to sleep in bed with us when it was all said and done! I think Sean's in love. When he came home tonight he said, "hey...where's our dog?" He misses her, and so do I!

Update...

Just wanted to let everyone know that in a few days, our profile will be posted online on Bethany's website. The website in http://www.bethany.org and then you click on View Profiles. All of the waiting families in the nation will be posted, but if you go to the top of the page and pull down the menu that says "show all", you can view just the waiting families in Iowa. We won't be on there for a few days, but just thought I would let you know. The letter that will be posted on there is the same letter that we had to write to the birthmother to put in the back of our profile book, but we added some things into the one on the website because someone who reads the profile on the website more than likely hasn't seen our book yet, so we had to add some personal things in it about us. The regular letter doesn't have the personal things about us in it. Just though you may be interested in seeing it. Check it out if you want. I'll let you know when I know for sure that it's posted!

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Birthmother's letter

In this process, Sean and I are to write a personal letter to the birthmother. I have been putting this project off, as I didn't know exactly what to write. I wanted to be able to express the emotions deep in my heart, but I didn't know exactly how to put those emotions on paper. I ended up saying just that in the letter when I sat down to write it tonight. I came out and said, "we are struggling with the perfect way to put our emotions onto paper. We decided to just give you the ramblings of our hearts in the hopes that we can portray just what we're feeling." Then I just let my fingers do the work. Through many tears, I composed the letter and was so filled with emotion when it was done that I could barely read it alound to Sean.

I am so amazed at birthmothers! Most of these girls are very young and have much growing up to do, but to choose life for their child when abortion is so accepted these days is unbelievable. I am so grateful for each of these birthmothers that I can't even put it into words. We met several couples today at our meeting at Bethany. Each of them were so different, but all so excited to be parents and all so full of love to give a child and so deserving of a child. In the beginning of this process, I will admit that I have had feelings of competitiveness in the sense that if a birthmother was going to be deciding to choose between us and another couple, I would feel that we could love their child more than anyone else. Today, I was proven wrong, all of these couples would be WONDERFUL parents and if ANY of them would be chosen before us, I can't see myself having any bad feelings at all. I am so excited for each of them to be able to have a child and we are no more deserving of a child than they are. This process has taught me so much that I am today, more than ever, grateful that I will have the honor of being an adoptive parent.

The meaning of being an adoptive parent has changed in my mind so much throughout these past several months. I think I have changed so much as a person and as a Christian in these last months and I owe it all to the Lord for giving me and Sean the opportunity to be adoptive parents. I haven't even adopted a baby yet, and this experience has been the most life changing experience I have ever had. I think Sean would say the same.

In the beginning, I had not a clue what was in store for us and I still don't know. I thought that I wanted a confidential adoption, I thought that I wouldn't want any contact with the birthmother or birthfather, I thought that would be too hard for ME. I thought it would be hard for ME to wait, and that it would be hard for ME not to be able to experience feeling my child inside of ME and I thought it would be hard for ME to not give Sean a child of "his own". I had not a clue that this adoption was not about ME at all!!! It's not about me or Sean or what WE will be going through, it's about the birthmother and her baby that we may have the honor to love and to be the parents of. What we will have to go through is NOTHING compared to the heartache and pain that a birthmother will have to go through. And this child WILL be ours and we WILL have this child together. God will have created this child especially for us and just because it won't be growing inside of me doesn't mean it's any less our child. It will be our child, the child that God made for us, just like he makes children for people who are able to carry them. They are all created by God for us to parent and to love! Our hearts will forever go out to ALL birthmothers out there! Adoption is about the child and what's best for it, not what's best for US. We never want our child to have questions about their birthmother/father that we cannot answer. We want the birthparents to always have the comfort of knowing that their child knows they loved it and that's why they chose life. We don't want our child to some day wonder why they were "given up" and wonder why their parents didn't want them. If keeping our child informed and keeping it's birthparents at peace with their decision to place their child for adoption means we need ongoing contact with the birthparents, we will be happy to do that! I can see nothing wrong with our child being loved by one more person in this world. I never dreamed 5 months ago that I would feel this way. In the beginning we wanted what was going to be easiest for us and cause us the least heartache. How could we even feel that way if we really thought about the heartache that the birthmother of our child would experience in order for us to have such a precious gift! Words cannot express our gratitude for this opportunity we have been given to be adoptive parents! It gives me chills to know that the Lord knows our child and that he always has, he planned this for Sean and I and we are so grateful!

"I knew you before I formed you in your mother's womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations." Jeremiah 1:5

Just as the Lord "appointed" Jeremiah as his "prophet to the nations", God has a purpose for our child...he already knows what that purpose is and knows who our child is. We are so looking forward to taking this journey which will lead us to the day that we get to meet our child that God created just for us!

Friday, June 16, 2006

Adoption Update

Sean and I had are final class all day today and came out of it with much excitement. Apparently, there are a couple of birthmothers that are due to have babies in July and a few in the fall as well and Bethany wants them all to see our profile. SO, I just happened to have a finished one in my car, so I gave it to the social worker who works with birthmothers and she's going to show it to them! It's sooo exciting! The social worker told us that the our profile looks great and they all seemed pretty excited to get to show it to some of these birthmothers who haven't chose adoptive parents for their children yet. So, as of today...we are officially waiting! They told us that we needed to have things ready and that it is time that we go out and buy a carseat and the other necessities because they could be calling us any day! Please pray for us that we can remain patient! We are so looking forward to being parents and will be overjoyed the day we get "the call"! It sounds like it could be sooner rather than later! We hope so!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Great Day!

Well, today was a great day! The weather was BEAUTIFUL and it seemed like I just kept getting good news...I love days like that!

First, like I said, the sun was shining and it was beautiful out! Then I helped Chris move some bricks out of his lawn (which might not seem fun, but it was rewarding because it needed done!) so the landscaping that I helped them with was more noticeable and not overshadowed by a pile of bricks. Their plants and mulch that we put in looks GREAT by the way. In doing that, I got to spend some time with Bode today also. Then Chris and I and Bode went out to lunch. After that, I came home and did some things around the house and got the mail...I was so excited to receive and unexpected (although, MUCH needed) check in the mail from our insurance company for reimbursement of the rest of the year of our homeowners insurance. YIPPY! I was soooo excited! Also, while I was at home, Mom called to let me know that a few peices of my baby bedding (it's getting made by a woman in Muscatine) were done and she had picked them up. She said that they look great and I cannot wait to see them! Not everything is completed, but the curtain, bumper pad and blanket are. Also, we talked about the pictures that we are going to be hanging up in the nursery and how we should frame them. Any baby talk puts me in a good mood! Then Sean got off work early which was yet another bonus! To top it all off, Sean suggested we go eat dinner at CRAVE (it's a fun fondue restaurant). YUMMY! I was sooo excited because I have been nagging him since it opened to go because I LOVE it, and so tonight was the night. It was so great and Sean loved it too, which I don't think he expected to. It is such a fun place to go and it takes a while, so it gave us plenty of time to just sit and chat. We seem to struggle finding times to chat with Sean being so busy with work and school. It was nice to have some much needed conversation. We spent a lot of time talking about the upcoming adoption and how are lives are soon going to be changing completely. We are so excited for the change, but are trying to enjoy some "alone" time before we have the new addition to the family. It is so fun to see Sean so excited. He's good at acting easy going about the whole thing because I am so overly excited and he probably feels it's necessary to be calm and collected in an effort to keep me as calm as possible. Although, when we really get to talking about it, he can't help but be excited. He is going to be the BEST father and I know that seeing him with our child will make me love him even more!

Hope this great day extends into the weeks to come!

Monday, June 12, 2006

My Last 10 Google Searches...

Okay, so I got inspired by my sister's blog to post my last 10 google searches. You will probably see a common theme...

1.Adopted child baby books (surprsingly, there are several cute ones.)
2.Children books about adoption (I want to get as many as possible...I already have 2 and can't seem to find many more for some reason)
3.Strawberry Recipes (I went berry picking a few days ago and have 5 pounds of YUMMY strawberries and need to make something with them before they go bad)
4.Diaper Bags (just thought I would see what's out there. I am a purse junky and think I could become a diaper bag junky with all of the options out there!)
5.Homemakers Furniture (we're trying to find a glider or rocking chair for the nursery)
6.Art for Nurseries (I found what I think we're going to have a few weeks ago, but just keeping my options open)
7.Baby Depot (our baby furniture is in, and since we bought it from there and haven't picked it up yet, I just wanted to look at it...I am a bit excited!)
8.NARS cosmetics (I love it and no one in Iowa carries it, so I was just looking to see what new products they might have)
9.Airborn supplement (I hadn't ever heard of this type of vitamin so I was trying to get info on ir. I ended up buying it and it's pretty amazing!)
10.Stonecroft Christian Women's Club (checking for one in the Des Moines are)

There ya go, my most recent searches. I obviously have adopting a baby on my mind, BUT I am being completely patient! We started cleaning out what will be the nursery today. It's not done, but we got a lot accomplished. I am excited to get it all cleaned out so we can pick up the furniture and get things set up!

Friday, June 09, 2006

Impatience

People keep telling me to "keep them posted" on the progression of our adoption. I wish I had some new information for everyone, but as of now, we are continuing to sift our way through the last bits of paperwork, and do our final class and home study.

We were assigned a social worker a couple of days ago, so that is one step forward. We are anxious for the weeks to come, as we are expecting all of the paperwork to be completed and we will officially be awaiting a phone call. This is where I will struggle the most...

Most of you know me well enough to agree that I am lacking in the patience department. This whole process of doing paperwork, physicals, references, personal testimonies, self studies and more paperwork has kept me busy, therefor, I haven't had a lot of time to think and to be impatient. Once this whole process is done, all I'll be able to do is think and be impatient! So, I may need to find something to keep me busy. I'll work on that, but in the meantime, prayers would be appreciated! :)

Sean came into the room a few minutes ago and scared the daylights out of me...
Here I was, sifting through my Bible for something...ANYTHING, that would help me in the patience department. I was looking in the Master Index of my Bible under "patience" and was going to each individual scripture that it led me to. Sean is quite as a mouse (as many of you know) and all of a sudden, right by me, he says, "what are you doing?" I about jumped out of my chair! I could imagine how I must have looked though, I realized I was probably being overly frantic about finding what I was looking for. I AM frantic about it...I don't want to lose my patience for this process and get to the point where I am jumping out of my skin and can't think of anything else! And again, many of you who know me, know that it's very possible that I could get to that point. So I was looking to where I thought I would find and answer, I was desperate for an answer. Anyway, I answered Sean, "I am looking up patience in the Bible". Sean said, "what for?". I said, "because I need some!" He kind of gave a little laugh and walked out of the room. He was probably thinking, "good luck". I don't think he has any hope that I will someday be a patient person. Well, I hope to prove him wrong! :)

In my search, I realized that I wasn't going to find the patience that I was looking for by looking in the Master Index of the Bible. I could only find it by looking up to the Master Himself. So I stopped and said a quick prayer and when I looked back down at my Bible, immediately my eyes happened to focus in on this scripture:

"The Lord frustrates the plans of the nations and thwarts all their schemes. But the Lord's plans stand firm forever; his intentions can never be shaken." Psalm 33:10-11

This scripture spoke loud and clear to me, and it's quite simple...God has a plan for me and my frustration and lack of patience is just proof that I am not fully trusting in His plan. I will continually be working on that, as I know it is true. I often have to remind myself of this and remember that we will get our baby is His time, not ours!

All it took was for me to look up and God answered my prayer by allowing my eyes to focus on that scripture and by allowing my heart to understand it. After reading it I felt better, I no longer feared that I would not be able to overcome this lack of patience in my life. I was happy and felt like this burden of impatience had been lifted from me just by simply reading God's word. I know that I will have to continuosly remind myself to trust in His plan, but I know that I will be able to do it. It was like an immediate sense of relief after reading that scripture. It was the answer I wanted and the scripture I had earlier been searching for in the Master Index. So I decided to read on, and this is where it lead me...

"I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears. Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces. In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened; he saved me from all my troubles."
Psalm 34:4-6

Wow, what an amazing feeling to know that if I turn to Him, He will listen and He will save me from ALL my troubles! AMEN!

Catch up...

 
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I had said in a past post that I was going to start posting more pictures as soon as I got my camera back...so here are a couple from Memorial Day Weekend. Now that I have my camera back, I am excited to be able to take more pictures for my posts.

This weekend Sean and I are doing some SERIOUS clearing out at our place. We received a call that our baby furniture came in and we are anxious to go get it and set it up. SO, after church on Sunday, we will be doing some rearranging of our bedroom situation. Right now we have the "baby's room" as my Clarins office pretty much. So we plan to do some rearranging and moving some things into our bedroom and squeezing things where they'll fit so that we have room for the baby. Then, when we get that done, we can go pick up our furniture and actually have a place to put it. I can't wait to be able to keep you all up to date with pictures on the progression of the nursery. We hope to get the bedding (it's being made right now)soon after we have the furniture set up so that all can be ready for when the baby arrives! It's so exciting, but still, we're remaining patient!

Hilarious!

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I just thought this was a hilarious picture of Bode! :) He is so cute! This picture of him just makes me crack up!

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Friends!

I have had a great couple of days. Kay has been here visiting and we have just been catching up and talking nonstop for the last 48 hours. Last night we were talking about friends and the friends in our lives. I am so lucky to have my friends that I have. I remember the time in my life when I had so many friends...people that I could call just to hang out if I was bored or to go out for the evening. My group of friends has definitely gotten smaller by probably half, yet I could not feel more blessed than I do now with my small, but AMAZING group of friends. I know that I can call each and every one of you if I need ANYTHING and I hope that you all know I would do anything for all of you. Even though we are all busy and may go days, weeks or even months without much contact, I cherish you and the friendship that I have with you! As I have stated in a past post, you are all family! Thank you! Thank you! You are all wonderful women and I am honored to call you friends! I love you all!

Monday, June 05, 2006

Our week...

Well, today was a busy day, but good. I woke up very early to go get some final tests done to finish up all of the steps to my physical that is required for the adoption. The final steps were a TB tst and a Tetnis shot. My arm is sore from the Tetnis shot, but I think I will live. :) After that I came back home and went back to sleep for a couple of hours, I just wasn't rested enough! I then got up and went to Melissa's to color/cut her sister's hair and then just sit and chat with Melissa, Lois and Heather. It was a good afternoon. Following that, Sara and I went to What's For Dinner to do our meal preparations for the next month (and they look YUMMY!) and then Sean and I and the Knutson's went out to dinner at Rock Bottom and had a great meal. Then Sean and I stopped at Golf Galaxy to price some golf clubs that Sean may be purchasing (by the way, he's doing much better!) and then came home.

Tomorrow I get to watch Bode which I am soooo looking forward to! It's been several days since I have seen him and I miss him soooo much! Kay will be arriving around noon and will be staying the night. I am so excited to get some time with Kay. It has been way too long and I have missed her so much! It will be fun to just sit around and catch up in person. Then she will be going back to KC on Wednesday. I work on Thursday, Friday and Saturday and then I think Sean and I will be getting together with Sean's parents for dinner possibly. Again, another set of people that it has been a while since we've seen. It is unbelievable how time just flies by! There are just not enough hours in the day or days in the week. I have been waiting for months for my (Stewart side) whole family to get together because we need a casual family picture of just Mom, Dad, Chris, Cassie and I for our Adoption Profile Book. It seems that we are never together all at once. I don't know that I remember the last time we were all together. It looks like the next time will be the weekend of my baby shower on the 24th, so FINALLY I'll be able to get that picture I need in order to complete our book! We are so looking forward to that weekend and having everyone all together. We hope to officially be "on the list" at Bethany and awaiting the arrival of our baby by then. It is so much paperwork, it seems to be never ending, but it has been exciting each step of the way, and we know that the most exciting part is yet to come! We just cannot even imagine how we will feel the day we get "the call" that there is a baby for us. We are patiently looking forward to that moment!

Sadly, I left my camera in Muscatine accidentally several days ago, so my posts have been lacking recent photographs. I will be getting my camera back tomorrow and promise to have several new photos posted soon!

Prized Possesion

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For those of you who know Sean, even just a little, you could probably guess what his prized possession is...you guessed it, his golf clubs! He loves his golf clubs as if they love him back. He spends as much time with them as possible. He is proud of them and he misses them when he doesn't see them for long periods of time. He cherishes every moment spent with his precious clubs.

Well, the unthinkable happened sometime between Monday night and Saturday night...

Sean's clubs were stolen. Yes, I know...it is a tragedy and Sean is hanging in there, but it's been a rough day at the Peakins. Not only were Sean's clubs stolen, but mine were too. I didn't have the emotional attatchment to mine that Sean had to his, nor was Sean too upset about the lack of my clubs in our lives, but he feels a bit of emptiness inside him without his clubs. He has gone through several emotions...denial, anger, sadness and finally acceptance. No need for anyone to worry, we'll be fine and Sean is dealing with it as well as can be expected. He spoke with the police and is going to talk to our insurance agent about replacing them. It's a blessing we have renter's insurance! Although, he will have new, shiney clubs...he is deeply hurt that he will never again see his clubs that he has grown to love. I am remaining strong for him, so he can get through this tough time.

In case anyone was wondering...they were stolen out of our storage space located outside our apartment door. Nothing else was stolen...just the 2 golf bags. Sean did have some golf shoes and ProV1's (his "expensive" golf balls), his favorite FSU Divot replacer thingy in the bag too. Oh and his FSU head covers. It was a bummer and Sean really was pretty upset, but he'll be happy when he's swinging some new clubs. I had just gotten my clubs last summer and had only played with them a handful of times. I did like them, but they were not anything special...I think I will miss my hot pink golf tees that were in the golf bag more than the clubs! :) At least I can replace those for just a few dollars! And my clubs were pretty inexpensive and will be easily replaced as well. Anyway, that was our big news of the day. Hope you all had a great weekend!

Thursday, June 01, 2006

shopping, eating, sleeping, shopping...

My last few days consisted of shopping, eating, sleeping, shopping, driving, going to the doctor (yuck!) for a physical, doing hair, doing makeup, shopping, eating, driving and a lot of talking on the phone between it all! :) Also, I got a much needed dose of Brigg and Lani...even if it only lasted about 20 minutes! They are amazing little kids! I love them to peices and am amazed at how much they change and grow every time I see them! I am so blessed to have the most adorable 5 nieces and nephews!
I had a great start to a week...except of course the physical and the driving, but all in all, it was great. I thank God for my friends who will have lengthy telephone conversations with me which definitely help to pass the time during the driving portions of my life. :) Also, tonight I am thankful for all of my friends and family who are there for me when I think that my troubles are so traumatic...thank you for helping me to realize that they're not. I appreciate my wonderful friends and family for not judging me and for being able to laugh with me about things that I may not have thought were that funny without them. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for being "real friends"! To me...you are all family!

"There are 'friends' who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24

I spent these last few days with my mom having such a great time. When you're young, you just never realize all of the things that you will one day be discussing with your mom. It's amazing how little I keep from her now...it's a great luxury to be able to talk about any and everything with someone. Thanks mom...and sorry at the same time. I don't know if you enjoy this new luxury of mine as much as I do. Ha. :) I appreciate your understanding so much!
I love you!