Tate LOVES spending time with Daddy, and after all of the fun they had today, they enjoyed a relaxing nap together! 

First Bath!

 
 
 
 

A hotel sink isn't the greatest place to give an infant his first bath! Tate hated every minute of it! As you can see in the picture, I was obviously going on about an hour of sleep and am not hiding it very well! :) Tate was calm and content when we had him warm and clothed and Daddy was by his side! 

 
Tate's 1st outing...to Wal-Mart!!!
 
I LOVE this picture!!!!!!!
 
We could just stare at him ALL DAY!
 
His pacifier is hilarious! 

 
 
 
 

Today (and these last 48 hours) has been the most emotional day of Sean and my life! I cannot even find the words to express what we're feeling. It has been a rollercoaster, but we are ecstatic to have our son home! We cannot stop stairing at him...it's all so surreal! We are in love more than we ever knew possible! I don't have a lot of time to say a whole lot, but I wanted to post pictures. I'll write more in a few days! Thanks to everyone for all of the continued prayers! Please continue to pray for Maggie and Brandon, Tates birthparents! We are so grateful for them and are amazed beyond any words at their maturity and their selfless love for Tate. He is so blessed! Right now, Sean and I feel like we are the luckiest people alive! 

It's A Boy!

Well, I can't even find a way to put into this post my current emotions. We have a son! Tate was born on Thursday, October 5th at 7:59 pm. He weighed 7 lbs. 4 oz. and was 21 1/2 inches long. Sean and I will be taking him home tomorrow. We'll post a picture ASAP! I am a puddle here at the computer and I can't write much more. Thanks for all of the prayers. We would appreciate ongoing prayer because the birthmother and father still have 5 days to change their minds. We met and talked extensively with the birthfather and hit it off immediately. We are confident that both birthparents know they have made the right decision and this will go through. Although, there are no guarantees in life. Please continue to pray!

A Mother's Prayer

She's in my thoughts, each day I wake,

I wonder how she feels.

I pray for her, with all my heart

God please, do help her heal.

Hold her close & help her Lord,

their love will never part.

Please help her heal & help her smile,

for this will break her heart.

Help her know how much she means,

to a family whose hope was lost.

God, help her know with all our joy,

we'll not forget her loss.

Please give her love & bless her heart,

and help her through each day.

Dry her tears & heal her soul

...for this Dear Lord I pray.




I found this poem tonight and although it's written by an adoptive parent who already has their child, I still can relate to these feelings. I pray everyday for the birthmother of our child. God knows who she is and we know he listens to our prayers. I can only imagine how much gratitude I will have for our baby's birthmother once we receive our baby. I am sure it will be beyond any gratitude we imagined we would have, but our thoughts and prayers are with her everyday even though we have yet to meet her or know who she is. I just really loved this poem and thought I would share it with all of you!

Boating

 
I was the Stewarts' personal photographer while boating yesterday. It was so fun and I got over 100 pictures! Okay, so I may have been a little camera happy, but they're just such BEAUTIFUL subjects! :)
 
This isn't a fuzzy picture, it was taken through a very dirty boat window. :)
 
Bode was lovin' up on his Daddy...
  
and his mommy!

He was such a little sweetie! He LOVED boating and WE all love boating with him, because it forces him to hold on to us tightly!!!

Cutey!

 
 
  
I took these while watching Bode today...he's just plain cute!!!

Cookie Dough

 
Bode loves cookie dough!
 
It was so cute to watch him eat it!
  
About 2 seconds after this picture was taken, Brenda hollered from the kitchen, "Bode, do you need some milk?" The words weren't even out of her mouth and the cookie dough was chucked and Bode was at a full sprint into the kitchen for his milk. SO CUTE! He definitely takes after his Daddy!

LPGA Tour here I come!

 
  
It was a BEAUTIFUL day out today. Sean was ecstatic when I suggested that we golf after church. We went to a little course in Waukee and played 18 holes. We had a great time and I was much improved on the back nine compared to the front nine. I believe Sean said I shaved off about a stroke per hole! I am so good, and I only lost 1 ball! Well, I didn't really lose it...we found it in the creek and were unable to fish it out. Oh well. I LOVE playing golf, I just wish I was a bit more skilled at the game! :)

King Crab

 
I made King Crab legs for dinner the other night and I don't know that I have EVER seen Sean so happy about a dinner I've made!

 
He gets sooooo happy when he gets a HUGE chunk of meat out...it makes it worth all the effort.

  
He ate a TON...this was only one of the plates of crab legs he ate!

GO HAWKEYES!!!!

Just wanted to make sure everyone was planning on cheering the Hawkeyes onto victory this evening!!! It's a HUGE game for us! GO HAWKEYES!!!!!!!!!!!

Being Good

"No man knows how bad he is until he's tried very hard to be good..." -C.S Lewis

This quote is so true! Sean and I have several things that we are continuously "working on" in our lives. When you are trying to be aware of the sinful or "bad" things that you are doing it makes you realize that you usually just don't notice you're doing it. It's so true that I have never realized how "bad" I was until now that I have been trying very hard to be "good". No one ever told me this journey would be easy, just that the final reward is beyond anything imagineable!

Moving On

Since the news that we weren't going to be parents of the babies in Virginia, we have been keeping ourselves busy. Last night we went to dinner and a movie and then actually got a full nights sleep!!! It was great to sleep deep. For some reason, I still had a difficult time getting to sleep just thinking of the days events, but once I got to sleep, I didn't wake up for 9 1/2 hours! :) Then today, Sean had class and worked and I did some laundry and ran some errands. I prepared a yummy new recipe for dinner (Thanks Cathy!) and we watched Grey's Anatomy! I LOVE Grey's Anatomy! Then Sean and I played cribbage. I won the tournament! I ALWAYS do...Sean says I am lucky, I say there is no such thing as luck, I am just skilled. :) Anyway, we have been keeping busy which is keeping our minds off of our recent disappointment. In my Daily Bread Daily Devotional yesterday, it talked about the command of Galatians 6:2, "Bear one another's burdens." It states in the devotional that 'Bearing one another's burden helps make the burden bearable.' I know that the reason our disappointment was so bearable for us was because many of you have been bearing our burden for us and praying for our strength. Thank you all for making this easier on us! We love each of you so much!

We're looking so forward to this weekend. We have several things on the agenda, but possibly the most exciting is the Iowa vs. Ohio State game on Saturday night. Oh, how we would so LOVE to be able to attend!!! We will root on our Hawkeyes from the comfort of our home in front of our big screen! If anything could cheer me up this weekend, it would be the Hawks defeating the Buckeyes!!!! :) ha. GO HAWKS! I am realistic though, and understand that this will be probably the most difficult game of the year for us and we may not come out victorious. We will support our team to the end no matter what! Anxious to see how it all unfolds!

The Outcome

Well, what a relief it is to no longer wonder what is going to happen with these situations in Virginia. The news is that we will not have to travel to Virginia. Both of the birthmothers selected other families for their babies. Mya, the twins' birthmother liked our profile, but selected a couple that was closer to Virginia. The other birthmother, we didn't get too much information about, just that she selected another couple. We are disappointed, but really are okay with everything. We know that we will get that baby that we're meant to have. We REALLY appreciate all of the prayers and believe that's why we are doing so well at accepting this outcome. It is definitely not the end of the world, and when we look into the eyes of our baby when we get it, we will be SO HAPPY that we didn't get any of these babies in Virginia! I am sooo glad that God has his perfect master plan and I don't have to worry about having control of my life! I can't wait to see His master plan unfold in our lives! Looking forward to the future and feeling VERY relieved!

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I am on the verge of tears because I am so stressed out! It is 2:40, and we STILL HAVEN'T HEARD A THING!!!!! This is the worst! I feel sick to my stomach and I don't know what to do with myself! PLEASE PRAY!

SERIOUSLY!!!!

Okay, so it's 1:00, and we STILL haven't heard anything. I don't know if that's a bad sign or a good sign. We'll keep you posted!!!

Update

Okay, seriously, my patience is being tested FOR SURE!!! We got an update from our social worker today and it sounds like Mya (the twins birthmother) has reviewed the profiles and taken home the ones that she is considering (we are still in the running!!!) and going to go through them again at home and make a decision. Tomorrow, she has an appointment to go into the office and talk with her social worker about her decision and do the necessary things to get things all together and we should hear by 1:00. Now, we were originally told that we would hear by Monday or Tuesday at the latest, and that didn't happen, so we're not holding our breath! :) We'll see.

After getting all of that information, we were told by our social worker that Mya's social worker has another client that just had a baby boy and he is still in the hospital because he is jaundice (spelling???), but that we would be a good match for her as well. He was born on September 22nd and he is also black. His birthmother is in college and he is a product of a one night stand and she has no way to contact the father and apparently doesn't really know him, so he's not in the picture. SO, if Mya doesn't choose us, then our profile is going to be shown to this other birthmother and we may have to go to Virginia if we get picked by her anyway! This last week has been NUTS! Hopefully this will all be over soon! Please pray!

For our anniversary!

 
 
  

For our anniversary, Sean decided to put on my new pajamas and do a little "love jig" for me. Boy was it a beautiful moment! He loves me soooo much! :)

Calming the nerves :)

 
 
 
  

With all of the stress we've had waiting for a phone call about the twins, we decided to calm our nerves this evening. Sean did that by consuming some adult beverages and posing for a photo shoot! He is such a stud muffin!!!! I love him sooooo much, he has been wonderful at distracting me from thinking about this situation. He really is amazing...can't you tell from the pictures?!!! :)

Waiting...Waiting...Waiting

Yes, we are STILL waiting to hear. We did get a call today letting us know that the birthmother (her name is Mya) was looking at our profile today. Our social worker also told us not to hold our breaths about hearing anything today. SO, the wait continues! I would think that the birthmother would want to make a decision sooner rather than later, but who know. So hopefully we'll hear something tomorrow! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! This wait is driving me nuts! In the conversation with our social worker, I also found out that Mya will be looking at 5 profiles (this is more than we originally expected), so we have a 20% chance of getting picked. I'm not quite as optimistic after hearing about the number of other profiles she will see. :( We are doing okay though and keep reminding ourselves that whatever is meant to be will be. We went out for sushi tonight and while we were there, I said to Sean, "if anything was going to perk me up today, it was going to be sushi!" :) YUMMY! Then we went and played some pool and now we are just going to relax the rest of the evening and watch some football. We would still appreciate prayer as we know we may have a big day ahead of us, hopefully tomorrow!!! We'll let you know as we hear more.

The Sunset

 
 

This was the sunset yesterday...it was BEAUTIFUL!!! I just thought I would share it with all of you.

Today is a beautiful day as well. It is Sean and my anniversary, the weather is gorgeuos and we may find out today that we are a Mommy and Daddy of twins! I have decided though, that if we find out that we are not going to get the twins, that it will still be a beautiful day. We are hopeful and in constant prayer until we get word... 

Twins Update...

It has been a few days since I have posted anything and so I just wanted to update everyone on the situation...

We are sitting on pins and needles at our household awaiting the news of whether we are a mommy and daddy or not! This is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do! It looks like we will not be hearing anything until Monday or maybe Tuesday, so we can do nothing, but wait. This is definitely a test for me, as I tend to be soooooo impatient! I am doing the best I can, but have slept only a few hours each night since we got word that we may get the twins! I have been in constant prayer and I know many of you out there have been praying for us as well. I am not doing very well at guarding my heart...I am just too excited! I know if we find out that the twins will be placed with another couple, we will be disappointed, but will get through it. We understand the challenges that could come with raising twins, but we are willing to take on those challenges and have grown more and more excited these last few days. I don't think I have EVER been so consumed with something in my whole life. I can't seem to think of anything else! Hopefully I can get some sleep these next couple of nights and then we can find out one way or another if we will be raising these two precious lives! Whether we will or not, at least we will be able to move on and accept whatever happens. I must admit, we want to raise these twins sooooo badly!!!!!!!!!!

If we do get them, something tells me that I won't have time to post a very extensive blog regarding the situation. I'll have Cassie post about it if it happens, but this is what we know so far, if we end up getting them:

We have looked into some flights and stuff and have decided that we will drive to Virginia instead of fly. We will want a car while we're there and it would be much easier to pack our car full with what we need instead of having to stuff everything in suitcases to be checked. SO, as soon as we get the good news (IF we get good news!), we will be getting everything in order here. We will have to go purchase some items and then we plan on heading out right away. Sean will stay for the first 4 days or so and then will fly out of Virginia to come back to Des Moines so he can attend class and work for about 4 or 5 days. During those days, Cassie (and maybe Mom) will come out and help me. Then Sean will fly back to Virginia for the last few days and we'll drive home with some precious cargo!!!! :) Just thought I'd let you all know now what we're thinking so that I don't have to post a super long explanation amidst everything else if this all pans out. I will definitely post the news as soon as we hear it whether it is good OR bad.

We're hopefull, but are trying to remain guarded a bit. Sean is doing a great job at guarding his heart...me on the other hand, I am not doing such a great job at that. I may be borderline devastated if this doesn't work out! This waiting is pure agony! We appreciate your continued prayers! Hopefully good news to come!!!

TWINS!!!!

Well, I wasn't going to post this on my blog, because I didn't want to jinx it, but pretty much everyone already knows about it, so here goes.

We found out yesterday that the birthmother in Cedar Rapids had changed her mind and decided not to place her baby for adoption. A short few minutes following that, we got word of a birthmother in Virginia who delivered twins on September 12 that has already signed away her rights and is just looking for a family for her babies. To make a long story short, she is interested in us and our profile was put in the mail to be overnighted to her yesterday and she will make a decision between us and another couple by early next week! Pretty exciting!!!! We are trying to guard our hearts a bit, as we don't want to be completely devastated if this doesn't pan out. Although, I must admit, the idea of twins is pretty exciting AND scary at the same time! :) We're hopeful, but could really use your prayers...not only for us, but for these babies and their birthmother.

If we find out that we were chosen, we will fly out that day or the day after to go to Virginia and get them. They are in a great foster home right now and are healthy and doing great! When we get to Virginia, we would get to take them right away and stay in a hotel. I would have to stay in Virginia for up to 2 weeks before I could bring them home due to an Interstate Placement Law. No biggie, but I know I would be anxious to get them home! Due to Sean's school and work situation, unfortunately he wouldn't be able to stay that entire 2 weeks. He would come for a few days in the beginning and either Cassie or Mom would come for a few days in the middle and then Sean would probably come back for a few days in the end to help me bring them home.

I don't know that this has all really sunk in for me or not yet. If it does happen, what a great birthday gift it will be for me since TODAY is my birthday!!!!!! This is far beyond what Sean and I ever dreamed would happen, but we know that if it's meant to be then it will be. If these are our babies, then it will work out. We know it's not a definite and we're trying to remain realistic.

For those of you who are interested in the information about the babies:
It's a boy and a girl, they are both currently 5lbs. and doing very well, eating well and healthy. They babies are African American and ADORABLE I have heard!!! :)

I will definitely keep you posted with any new information on the situation, but in the meantime, please pray for us, the birthmother and the babies! We would really appreciate it! Thank you! Hopefully I'll have some exciting news to come!