This evening when Tate was playing alone in the living room, I overheard him say something that upset me and that I was shocked to hear come out of his mouth.
He said, "I'm allergic to God".
I walked in the living room and asked him what he said and he repeated it. We went on to having a conversation about why he would say something like that and so on and so forth. It still makes my stomach hurt to relive me hearing him say those words. Ugh.
Each night before bed we say prayers. Tate is praying and starts to SOB...he's praying to God and saying that he is so sorry and he doesn't want Him to be mad at him. It was like racking sobs. I started crying, he was crying...genuinely crying. He couldn't catch his breath, tears running down his face....oh my, it was heartbreaking.
We obviously then had a conversation about how God isn't mad at him and how God loves him no matter what. It wasn't really working very well to calm him down. He was asking me to tell God that he's sorry and that he doesn't know why he said that. I told him to tell God himself and he was confused. I explained that that is what praying is...it's us talking to God. I told him to just talk to God. It was like it clicked. He has prayed every night for such a long time, but apparently I never explained that when we pray, we are talking to God. It was so sweet to listen to him pray after that. And then it was funny because at the end of his prayer he said, "and please don't give me a bad dream tonight because I said I was allergic to you." Oh. My. Heart. He has problems with nightmares/night terrors still on occassion and prays every night for God to "keep his bad dreams away and his good dreams to stay".
I have no idea where he got the "allergic to God" from, but I have a feeling he won't ever say that again.
I love my little Tater so much!!!!