the same eyes

Can you imagine carrying your baby for over 9 months, going through labor and delivery, nursing your baby for 2 days because you loved it so much you wanted what was best for it, just to hand it over to 2 strangers to raise because you couldn't give that baby all you feel it deserved? I can't...not in a million years can I imagine what that would feel like.

For 3 1/2 years, we have never been able to look into the eyes of Tate's amazing birth mother. She has not seen Tate in person since the day she left the hospital when he was 2 days old. We have done our best to send pictures and videos of Tate as well as letters expressing our gratitude. We've wanted desperately to be able to express what an amazing gift it was that she gave us. We prayed for a day to come when she would feel ready to meet us and see Tate again.

That day is soon approaching. We have plans to meet Maggie in person on Wednesday. There are so many emotions that I am feeling. I am excited, emotional, nervous, anxious and scared. Most of all I am grateful that I will get to meet Tate's first mother, the one who gave him life and sacrificed her job as mommy to Tate all because she loved him unconditionally. The one that gave me the opportunity to be a mommy. It's a gift that I will never be able to repay or express my gratitude for.

It is so amazing to be able to witness Brandon's love for Tate when we get together with him. It's indescribable. I expect that seeing Maggie look into the eyes of her son will be just as indescribable. I've only seen a couple of pictures of Maggie, but that's all it took to see that Tate has her beautiful eyes. And for me to be able to look into those eyes, the woman's eyes who gave my son life is something I only dreamed I would be able to do someday!