Out of the mouths of Mommies

I saw this on someone else's blog and I thought it was hilarious, so I am copying the idea...

These are some funny/strange things that have come out of my mouth lately:

It would be a lot easier if you'd eat those noodles with your fork instead of those sticks.

What? You're all wet? Is that water or pee? Let me smell it. Stop running away...come here right now so mommy can see if you smell like pee!

Come here so I can smell your bum.

No, we cannot eat dinner in Mommy's bed. We eat dinner in the kitchen. Mommy said no, we will not be eating in Mommy's bed.

No, that fly is not going to fly in your penis hole. Nope, he won't fly in your nose either. It's okay...stop screaming, the fly is harmless!

Put your sunglasses on so that you stop sneezing!

That's not a vaccuum, it's Mommy's back scratcher.

Tate, we don't eat Sweet and Sour sauce with a spoon. I don't care if it's good...it's sauce. I know you like it, why don't you dip your pizza in it.

You have a choice, we can go on a nature walk or we can go home and eat ice cream. What's your choice?

Many of these things would make a whole lot more sense when being aware of the context in which they were used, but being an outsider hearing me say these things makes them pretty comical! Ha.